Ep.325 – Strings of Resilience: Brandi Wyne’s Journey Through Music, Advocacy, and Healing

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Hi, and welcome back to the when words Fail Music Speaks podcast, where we fight depression with the power of music. Today, I, Amanda Dolan, and James Cox are joined by. I'm James. You're. No. Yeah, I'm Amanda. You're James. Man. I'm. We are just all over the place. It's your fault, James. You put me in the wrong box earlier. So, Amanda May James, we are joined by Brandi Wong. Brandi is originally from Cleveland, Ohio. She came up playing in a range of regional bands, including the rock outfit the Scrapes and country trio the Girls. She adopted the stage moniker Brandywine, which I kind of love for her solo work, and moved to Seattle in the late two thousands. Began recording your own music. She creates a dynamic hybrid of rock, pop, r and b and blues. Her love of Aretha pink and old Motown helped create this unique sound and 2019. The ep split personality helped her gain some traction, headed into the next decade with additional singles like 2020 one's Don't Go there and underneath it all, that was released in 2022 and that featured adult contemporary singer Michael Cagle. After a run of well received independent singles and eps, Brandywine signed with World Movement Records in 2022. Last month, she released a new ep called love, loss and hope, and her single smarter than I just looked is currently ranked number 18 on the UK Talk Radio Top 100 and being a survivor of domestic violence and abuse as a child, many of her songs are a story of her life and the healing process experienced through her music. She tries to give a voice and strength to those who can't be heard. So thank you so much, Brandi. So happy to have you here.

Yeah, happy to be here. Thanks for inviting me.

So, first, I want to ask you a question. So, you are a great guitarist because, you know, I've obviously heard your stuff, but on Facebook today, I found out that you, uh, had a, uh, finger picking accident. You, uh, stretch the left tendon, is that right?

Yeah, I actually. I damaged the tendon in my thumb of my right hand. Um, I. I was. Yeah, I was practicing finger picking.

You're going too hard.

Yeah, I don't know what I was. I'm like, I don't normally finger pick. And that was something my instructor was trying to get me to get better at.

Right.

So I was being a good little student and practiced too long, plucked too hard, did something, but I felt a pop. And. Yeah, long story short, it's been out of commission for a while now. I wear a brace kind of on and off. There's still, like, a bump there, though. And I've been told it's supposed to take, like, another four or five weeks. I mean, I'm not a great guitarist, so, yeah, I jump in when it's needed, but. So I'll survive, but it is very hard because I keep wanting to go towards my guitar, and I'm like, no.

No, don't touch it.

I'm gonna make it work.

Rest. So.

Especially that great prs I got in the back screen that we talked about before we recorded. Yeah, yeah.

And, yeah, so. And also, there's so much about, like, allowing yourself that time to, like, rest and repair and recover that so many of us, especially moms, don't spend as much time as maybe we should, because we're in that go, go, go taking care of everyone else kind of space.

Yeah.

So, like, James, do you want to start with some questions or.

Yes, I do. So on your Facebook page, I think also Apple music. You know, I'm a big fan of Apple music instead of Spotify, because I learned Spotify doesn't pay their artist. Yeah, yeah. Okay, so. So Katie Gordon got. Got in contact with. With you through to me. And. And so let's get. So you're. You're a country artist or pop artist, because it says pop artists on Apple music and everywhere else.

So what kind of an artist I am is actually up for debate, depending on who you talk to. I originally entered the music scene branded as a rock artist.

Okay.

And I was told that apparently, I don't have enough tattoos or ear piercings to qualify for that. So I was told I am pop. But then some of my stuff, I guess, was told, comes across as country. And then other reviews, like, there was a review done in the UK, and they say I'm an adult contemporary, so I honestly have no clue. So as long as the person likes it, they can stick it in whatever box they want. I'm really not particular.

So with that, like, not being. No, like, so not being, like, a particular, you know, cookie cutter spot, how does that affect, like, the algorithms and people finding you?

It makes it hard. So, like, this time around, the ep we put out was a bit more pop and I guess, country sounding. The next one that we're putting out definitely is going to have a slightly heavier feel, some more, like, evanescence sound.

Sweet.

Part of my dilemma is so growing up, my influence was Aretha Franklin. She was my all star idol, like, end all wannabe, you know, idol that I looked up to. And as I grew and got exposed to more music and different kinds of music, it just evolved. But I still kind of have that sound at the base, and so it just complicates everything. So that's where, like, a lot of people will say the Motown feel comes from, is her being one of my influences. I do like having a rock sound, but then I also like the art of storytelling, which tends to lean more towards country music and not pop or rock. So, again, it's just. It's like a big hodgepodge, and no one's really figured out where I'm supposed to be yet.

You're exactly where you're supposed to be.

So I just make what I like. We are actually going to be doing a. My producer and I, we're going to be putting out a country single that will actually be meant to be country in the next year just to see how it flies. But it's a little tricky because I wrote it as a duet, so now I'm still looking for a male artist to collab with on it.

So country or rock? Which one do you kind of lean towards more?

I mean, I. They're kind of one in the same, to be totally honest.

That's true.

I think country and western are probably different, but country music has evolved so much that it's been crossing over into rock and pop for generations.

Right.

So, yeah, I don't know. I mean, personality wise, I probably fit in better with country. I'm kind of a down home girl and, you know, I was. I ride horses and I know how to hunt and, you know, all the stereotypical stuff I actually do, but it's, you know, because I was in Ohio, so. Right. Depending on where in Ohio, there's not a whole lot going on, but I'm very conservative. Like, I'm not gonna be one of those artists that'll be on stage in, like, a bikini and fish nuts. So I like throwing my anime stuff in there, but, yes, about as far as I go.

Well, see, the reason why I asked you about that is because I have a fun thing we can do right now. Um, that's why I wanted to do. You do? Um. Uh, I'll go to testing out on your rock. On your rock catalog. Okay, so. So what I'm going to do is I'm going to show you a vinyl record, and you tell me if you heard this band or what does this. I will mean to you. Okay. I got three of them. So this is like. Okay, so we got. We got Soundgarden.

Okay. I've listened to Soundgarden.

Okay. What do you think about them? Or. I mean. I mean. I mean, this is. This is album.

No, I like. Okay, I like music.

Yeah. Okay. And then we have one of my favorite bands of all time, death tones, the White Pony album.

I do not know that one.

You do not know that. Oh, good.

No, I'm sorry, but I will look it up later.

Yeah.

And then our last album is. I know you heard of this band. If not, then it's okay. We're not gonna, you know, stone templates. Purple album.

I know stone temple pilots. Well, yes, I do like their music.

So. So did that. When I showed you that, did. Did that bring you back some memories or. Okay, is there any stories you can tell us from. From that album that you. That brought back memories for you?

Oh, goodness. Um.

Because I think that was fair. Yeah. Okay.

I think fair.

I think my girlfriends would get mad at me, so I'm memories, but I can't. I cannot.

The permission.

This is like. James and I have often talked about how grateful we are that social media and digital media was not a thing when we were growing up.

We were young.

Thank God for that.

Right? Like, I'm so grateful that, granted, most.

Of us would probably be, like, social, like, stars as far as that goes, because what we did is way worse than what they have online right now.

Oh, yeah.

But at the same time, it's like. But there's no proof.

Oh, yeah. You cannot prove half of the things. I mean. Well, far more than that. And even if there was a picture taken, like, you get the negatives and it's gone. Like, there's no more.

Well, and that's. My one girlfriend is always. Whenever we talk about she stuff, she's like, allegedly, we did this, and it's like, there's no proof, so there's no proof.

They can't prove anything. Exactly.

I'm here for allegedly. Oh, yes. So I'm curious about, like, kind of talked about what kind of music you like. You play covers. You have released several covers on the show. We do something called Cover wars, where we listen to two covers of a song and kind of talk about what we like, what we don't like and who the winner is just because it's whoever. So I'm curious, though, like, your covers, we're not doing that to you today. Don't worry. But your cover recently, like, you released a cover of at last.

Yes.

That is very like rock. So how does it, like, how does it feel? Or what do you like about making a cover like yours instead of, you know, that copy almost?

Well, I should probably start by saying that it, at least in my eyes, it's considered one of the highest forms of flattery. I will only ever cover a song if I think the artist is phenomenal, and I already love the song. Etta James actually was one of my favorite artists growing up. She just had a gorgeous voice and at last was always a very pretty song to me. But whenever I thought about it or listened to it, I always got depressed and I was like, this is supposed to be a song about love, but it makes me want to curl up and eat ice cream. I don't know why. So that was kind of the angle I took with that one. I was like, I want to make it happy. I want to make it. The idea was to make it relevant for this generation, so maybe people would start listening to it again, and hopefully if they heard it, they'd be like, huh, where is that from? They could research and actually find the original and listen to that again the other way around.

Like, someone sees at last listens to a very different version and then finds you as an artist and goes down the rabbit hole of your music, which is another great way to find new artists. Did we already ask, like, how do you find new artists when you're ready to add to your collection?

I actually try to go out in the local scene here as much as I can and support local artists. So I've gotten a lot of really good music that way. I also will do random searches, like in YouTube. I'll put in new, new pop, a new hot pop band or new underground rock band or whatever, and it'll generate as well. It also helps that we have a station out here on one of the rock and roll stations that they play all local artists for, like this 1 hour during the night. Yeah. So it's great because I get to hear bands that maybe aren't even generally in the area right now anymore because they're still submitting their music. So. And I've just, yeah, there's a lot of really, really great songs out there, and I also rely on friends. I know a lot of people in the music scene I have a lot of friends on Facebook that are in the music scene and I'm usually very open. I'll be like, hey, I'm bored. I need new music. What should I be listening to? And people will send me links and.

I do the same thing. I do the same thing. Yeah.

One of the things, yeah, I noticed with your, like, at least when I was looking through your social media, specifically Facebook, you do a lot to lift other musicians up and spotlight them. And I'm not sure that a lot of, I think a lot of artists do, but there's also a lot that don't. So, like, why is that important, especially for smaller artists, you think, to put it out there for everyone?

I mean, at the end of the day, I mean, music's hard if you're really trying to make a go and get heard and get seen, especially in this generation, things like Spotify and streaming, they're great because it's easy to get stuff out there, but they've made it a hundred times harder now to get heard because there's this ocean of new stuff. And, you know, I know how difficult it is to record and to, you know, perform. Anyone who gets on stage, I will always give them props because there is nothing easy about it. Whether, you know, they're cover band artist, original artist, karaoke singer, it's like, it's the same risk you're putting yourself out there. You have to make yourself vulnerable. You have to, you know, give a story and give a performance. And I just, I think it's better if we helped each other out. I think more people would honestly get where they want to go and we could all help each other rise. It's. This isn't a, I'm going to beat you to the finish line. It should be okay, how can we get up this hill and then reach down and pull the next one up? But, yeah, it's not, it's not a widely shared mentality, unfortunately. Some people do see it as a very competitive me versus you, instead of it can be me and you. So, yeah, I just, I mean, if I can, I try to help out because, I mean, why not? It's better to lift people up than to push them back.

So we'll go on top of that. There are a plethora of artists and music genres out there on streaming devices. Spotify, Apple music. What do you do to ensure that your music gets in front of everybody else's that you need? That's what a need for people to hear.

I try to do things like this. I try to talk to others. I try to get out in the music store scene, I submit to as many local and indie stations as I can. Apple music, they do some. You can do some paid promotions where they'll kind of like, feature your. The start of your music or whatever as a suggestion based off of a genre. So I've tried that once or twice. Unfortunately, Spotify, I don't think there's much anyone can do. I actually just had a huge falling out with, with them.

Yeah, 100 listens counts as one, is what I saw.

Yeah.

Artists need superfans. We need the people who want to listen to our music three, four or five times a day are the ones that share it. They're the ones that, you know, buy merch and come to shows and basically they're taking that away from us and they're saying, yeah, no, you don't get that just because you're not on national record deal. Obviously that has to be fake.

And.

That'S just not right. No, they just don't want to pay out.

Yeah, well, and let's, let's be real. Like, Spotify's royalties are not. You're not going to make a whole lot of money from a hundred streams.

No .003% of a cent per stream.

That's not even.

So, like, you're not even gonna make a dollar off a hundred streams. Yeah, so it's one of those, like, in my. I'm like, why would you pay someone whatever to listen, you know, to a song? But I'm one of those, like, I will hyper focus on a song. Like, I'll find a song or an artist is all I listen to for a month and then, you know, it rolls off the rotation. I don't know. Yeah, I'm listening. ADHD.

Yeah, driving. If I'm not listening to an audiobook, I have my playlists and they kind of rotate through on what, who's on it and what I'm listening to, but I'll listen to that same playlist for a couple of months and I might listen to that person song six, seven times a day, depending on how much I'm driving. So.

Yeah, because if, I mean, I have playlists that are, you know, 45 minutes, and so for me, like, if I'm driving to the lake, it's an hour and a half, two hour drive, so I've got, you know, that and then back and then picking up kids, fronting the grocery store, doing dishes. Right. And so easily in a week, I could listen to the same song ten or twelve times yeah, well, unless kids.

Sometimes they dominate which songs you're going to listen to more, because my daughter will sit in the back. Not that one, mom. Skip.

Oh, yes. And you have. I know you said you have two kids. Two girls.

I have a son and a daughter. My son is 15. My daughter's 13.

Okay, so I have a 16 year old daughter and a 15 year old son. So we're like, right in that. That same sort of season of life with them. I saw that your daughter is a Hamilton fan.

Huge. Yes.

So my daughter and I are going to see Hamilton on Friday, and I am so super excited because music is something that she really loves. Her choir concert was last. No, Monday night. I forget what day it is. So her choir concert was a few nights ago, and then now we're doing this. So, you know, as we've talked about this before, too, here, like, when you hit 1213, like, that's when you start to find, like, the music that you love because you're not being forced to listen to your parents music anymore. So how do you feel like you influenced your kids and their decisions, what they listen to and all of that?

I mean, I do know she does pay attention when I say I don't like a particular singer for one reason or another, because sometimes I'll hear her repeat it with her friends later. So I do have to be very careful what I say. I'd like to think I've influenced her rather well, though, because her own natural selection with her and her friends, ironically, has been going back to eighties music. They've been pulling up journey and Bon Jovi and, God, she even had Toto in her playlist the other day. And I'm like, how are you finding this stuff? She goes, I don't know. I just. I look for. I try to look up for good music, and this is the stuff that comes up, and if I like it, I add it and I'm like, all right. She Rick rolled someone one day at karaoke, her and her two friends, and they full song, they're like, you've been Rick rolled? And I'm like, oh, lord.

Right, right. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I agree with your daughter. I mean, eighties are like, it's like fantastic music. And, um, we did a, uh, episode on Taylor Swift the other day, and there's one song of hers that I really, really like. It's called style. And that reminds me so much of the eighties, you know? Oh, yeah, yeah.

It was a time when there was actual instrumentation and harmony. And if.

We'Re pretty bad you know.

That'S what we're starting to head back towards. Yeah, the. The mainstream stuff that's been going for a long time with the more edm sounding stuff is apparently on a down curve. And the stuff that's more live music sounding is supposed to be swing, so I'm gonna wait and see, but I'm looking forward to that because I would love to hear, like, full big rock bands and, like, journey production things again, a new twist on them.

So, yeah, I'm definitely. I think James, too, definitely more into, like, that. I'm not, like, electronic music. That stuff, not my thing. I tend to lean towards the country, singer songwriter, americana. Like, that's my, like, go to. So. And I think one of the ways, like, for me, I find new artists, like you said, is through friends. Some of, like, my favorite artists or ones that were friends were like, you need to listen to this song, or I heard this song and made me think of you, and then sometimes that helps you find other people. I think my go to is, like, if I find an artist I like, then I go to, like, whatever the artist's name is, radio. So it, like, plays similar artists on apple Music. It's a great way to find newer people to you. You know, they may not be new, but I love that ability to find new, different songs. So I know you've got some gigs coming up here in the next couple weeks, so, like, playing live, you don't know what you're gonna get, right? Like in the. With the. The people at the venue, the fans listening, all of that. So how do you keep your cool or how do you, like, keep that professional attitude going when maybe people around you not so much have that attitude?

Um, I mean, when it comes to performing, I always take the attitude of if it's gonna go wrong or if it can go wrong, it's probably going to go wrong, you know, and it doesn't mean that it's going to entire show, but usually there's something here or something there. Um, and I've just kind of learned to laugh it off. I'm just like, oh, okay, well, it's out of the way now, so let's keep going. You know, or just remembering that everybody in the audience is human. Like, they're there because they want to feel something.

They.

They want to be part of an experience. They don't want to hear a perfect recording, because if they did, they go home and listen to it on their, you know, device.

That's what I'm saying. Yeah.

So it's, you know, we do the best we can, and we try to give the best show we can, and, you know, it's just about trying to connect with people. And as long as we do that, then, you know, we think it's probably. We did our job. Okay. Hopefully people leave smiling and not crying. So depending on the song, you know.

Yeah, I was like, sometimes I. Crying is not an all bad thing, especially when listening to music. I know it makes me cry sometimes. Not in a bad way, necessarily, but those emotions come out. Yeah, I think so.

I got a question for you. Okay. So I. I have listened to a love lost and hope, your ep that came out this year, and I love lovely day. And inside, I think those are some of the best songs ever I've ever heard in my life. But I would like to think that you think of these songs, like, you get inspiration from all kinds of things. Um, does the. Does nature, like. Like, this outside? Like, when you think of these songs, you, like, are you outside in nature? And. Okay, well, I got a good idea. Does. Does nature help you get inspired, or does, like. Like, what. What all inspires you, writing these. These songs?

Oh, goodness. Um, everything. Being out in nature, sometimes. Sometimes I'll just get an idea when I'm driving because I just happen to think of something or saw something. I've had full on songs where I dreamt them and woke up, and I was real quick to grab my notepad and try to write it down. Scurried. And sometimes it's about something that someone else was going through, happened to be involved in their venting or their healing process, and so then that causes me to start to think about it and write about that. And, I mean, I've got stacks of songs that haven't been put to music yet that are just lyrics because of how many. How many things I experienced and what goes on, so.

Well, I would love to have your ability to remember your dreams, because I can't. I've only remembered one of my dreams, so. And that's a span of 44 years now. So I really want your ability to remember anything that I dream. I don't care whether it's about.

That's about it.

Yeah. Yeah. Wow. That's great.

And I know you've spent, at least, I noticed you spent a lot of time, like, fixing the landscape behind your house to make it healthier, prettier, better for the environment. So, like, I love plants. Like, if you were in my office right now, you'd see that there's, like, more than five. Um, we'll just say more than five, less than 100 in my house, something. But, like, I know that caring for plants, and, like, I'm assuming for you, too, that nature outside helps give me, like, another sense of purpose. So, like, how does spending time on, like, caring for, whether it's, like, plants in nature or your kids, how does that help you take care of yourself as well?

Well, yeah, gardening is definitely very therapeutic, both growing the plants, maintaining them. I do the back. Yeah, I've been trying. I'm a little bit of a ecology person from high school. I was actually one of the founding members back when we were young for a group called Earthworks Junior, and announced this big international thing. I don't know how the hell that happened, but, you know, we were ten.

So it is what it is, right?

Yeah, it is what it is, but. So I've always had a strong connection with nature. I've always loved being in the woods, and I very much believe in being a steward, not a landowner, so. Meaning, if you own the property, then it's your job to better it for everyone, not just yourself. So, like, I try to plant native flowers and plants and stuff for the bees and whatnot. And that makes me feel good, too. But also having weeds and things that, when I'm not in a good mood, you know, being able to rip them out, I have learned don't trim hedges when you're angry. It does not end well.

So good to know for the gardening.

That is definitely how that one works. My kids, they just. They help me stay young. They're really good at reminding me about what joy is and what excitement is and how to look at things from different angles. They will get excited about something because of. And something about it that I would have never even thought about, like, going to the movies and like, yay, we get to go see a movie. Like. But, mom, mom, I wonder what else we're gonna.

Da da da da.

And I was like, what? Like, well, you know, we always run into somebody when we're out, so I wonder who we're gonna run into today, and then maybe we'll be able to make plans with them for the weekend, so. No, we gotta get there early. We gotta go, mom. We gotta get. It's like, oh, all right. Well, I guess. But, yeah, just finding joy in simple things, too, with them, they've really reminded me how important, like, family is. And we really try to make an effort to do things together. So we try to do board games together, or we'll do yard work, which they sometimes don't really like, but when it's done, they usually look back and they're like, oh, but we, you know, we got all this done.

Look.

And they'll brag to their friends what they did. So they may not at the time, but apparently it's not a horrible experience. But, uh.

And you're teaching them how to be an adult. You know, like, they're not adults yet, but, like I always say, my job as a mom is to raise adults, not raise children well.

But I want them outdoors doing things, too, like we have. We play in the creek. We go looking for salamanders still or go looking for little fish, or we'll go fishing. From time to time, we go camping. A lot of kids nowadays just live off of their tv and their electronics, and I think they're really missing out on everything we got to experience. So introducing my kids to flashlight tag for the first time, that was a huge thing for them. How did you come up with this game? I'm like, I don't know. It's just what we all played when we were little.

I don't think I played flashlight tag.

Oh, you did?

I don't think I am.

I played it at summer camp. It's got to be, like, dark and, like, we would. Yeah, it was always fun because you, you can't find people, and then all of a sudden, it's, like, found you with the flashlight, and that's, I mean, it's not, it's not, it's like, it's nothing exciting. And also, it's so much fun.

Yeah.

And it's, I think it's that moving things back to, like, that simplicity, like, like you kind of talked about, even with the music and the coming back of, like, taking some of that digital stuff out and going back to that original, you know, actual instruments, live kind of stuff, and big voices, like you, like the Aretha and the Etta James. Those are two huge voices. Yeah.

I had a bad habit of looking up to people that were a little out of my reach. I'm coming to learn that.

I mean, aim high, right? Like, what is it like if you, I don't know, whatever. If you shoot for the moon and miss, you still land among the stars or something like that, you know? You know, with those, like, big voices and, you know, I think we've seen this some with younger artists that they go and they use their big voice, but they don't take care of it. So, like, when it comes to that vocal health, what do you do to protect your voice? Your, all of that stay healthy hydration, definitely important.

I have seniors reflex, so I have to be careful about that. I have to be careful what I eat, and I have to sleep propped up. But then also I have a vocal instructor. I never stopped. The worst habits form when you get comfortable. And so I try to be very cautious about how I sing and how long, and he's a really good reminder because we'll go through an entire show and be like, well, this is what we're going to do. And he's like, okay, well, but you realize on this song, at this part, you were straining, so we need to figure out how we're going to get that without having that happen. And he'll go through, and it might be something that's a fluke and it just happens once or it might be something that I just fall back into from time to time. But I really think working with a vocal instructor is probably the most important thing you can do if you want to have a career.

Yeah, it makes so much sense because I like, I think about. I like to go to the gym. I'm not, like, really an athlete or anything. I just. It's fun lifting, moving weights around, but, yeah, like, form. Like, if you don't have the right form in the gym, you can hurt yourself. Not just, like, not gain the muscle that you want or strength that you want, like, hurt yourself. And it's the same idea. It's like when I have someone that's helping me with my form and keeping me, you know, aware, less likely to hurt myself.

Personal trainers, in order to get to the next level, and they don't just lose them once they get to the Olympics, they, you know, they keep with them. And this is basically, you're being a vocal athlete, so you really do need to have that professional by your side just to make sure you're doing everything right and you don't hurt yourself.

And, I mean, I would argue it's. It's your instrument, right? Like, your guitars behind you. Like, you've got to tune them before you play them. You don't want to, like, I mean, you're not going to throw them in, you know, the bathtub and let them sit there and get wet, right? Like, you've got to protect them as well. Like, you're. Yeah, your voice. You've got to keep the environment healthy.

Is there any, any liquids? Like. Like one line of water, the bigger one. But I've heard that that pineapple juices is, like, perfect for coating the throat and making it like, you know, stay the same. I mean, like.

I've been told apple juice, because it's not too acidic. Okay. But, like, my big thing is throat coat tea. I'm, like, addicted to the stuff.

Got it. Yeah.

I like the taste of it, too, but.

Oh, good. Well, yeah, yeah.

I love tea. All the teas. Hot tea, iced tea, tea lattes. I just. Tea, like, everything. It's a problem. It's a. You can see I have a. Right there. I have, like, a tea kettle in my office, sort of hiding, but. So I can make tea. I have to leave my desk. But it's, you know, it for me, it's a way that I can stay hydrated because I don't always like water, and I like the. The warm. It feels good. Okay. You know, it's so having, like, a professional hydration and the other. All of that to keep your voice healthy. What about, like, your mind, like, your mental health? What are the things you do for that?

Um, again, vocal coach. I'm not gonna lie. He ends up being my therapist sometimes on my own, my instruments. I mean, my music really is kind of my therapy. Someone told me a long time ago that music is medicine for people, and I think that's twofold. It's not only just a medicine to those who listen to it and are healing from it, also from the people creating it. So if I'm having a really bad day, I might get out my guitar or come to my piano and bang on the piano for a while or play something that's more aggressive. If I'm sad kind of thing, it's somewhere you can turn where there's no judgment, and you can let out anything that you're feeling. A lot of times, writing is the same way. If I have something in my head, I can forget about sleeping until it's written down anyway. So I might as well put it in my notebook and then exercise. I like going for walks, especially in the evening, once it's warm. Here in Washington, we don't have fireflies, sadly. But that was always one of my favorite things to do was when I was in Ohio, is go for walks in the summer with the fireflies.

I guess the matter is about which part of Virginia, because I lived in Woodbridge and I saw, like, nothing but fireflies at nighttime bed. But I I guess it's like, you know, they're released for sporadic creatures or. You never know.

We don't have them here. Oh, I'm in Texas. Oh, like, you're, like, I like to take walks in the summer. No, no, you don't. Go outside, like, unless you have to in the summer here. Yeah.

Triple digits.

We haven't. We've only hit 92 so far this year here. So, like, we. And it's been a very. We've had a lot of rain, like, a lot more than normal, which is good because that means that our lakes are full and everything's green. My poor son is not happy about it because it means he has to mow the yard more, but he'll get over it. And so, like, you know, we kind of mentioned in the beginning that you are a survivor. I was about to say a victim. You're not a victim because that is actually one of your songs, right?

Yes, it is.

So you've survived domestic violence and childhood abuse, and you want to use your music and your voice for those that don't have one that they can share maybe yet or that aren't heard. So what are some of the ways that you do that? And also, like, why is that important that we talk about this, even though it's hard?

Yeah, that is true. Well, with the music, I definitely try to address it, and I try to address it from a standpoint of, yes, this happened, but it's okay. Like, it's not your fault or others are there to be known that I wrote with my sister. The song is a combination of what she went through and then what a neighbor, a friend of mine went through. But it talks about thinking that they're alone and the abuse. And in the neighbor's case, it drives her to homelessness because she had to get away from it. But there are others that have gone through that, and they can see that and they will help, but you have to make it known that you want the help or even that that's what you're going through. Some people are very good at hiding what they're going through in their lives, either because they feel shameful or they're fearful. And we really need to make it more normal to be able to speak up about this stuff. Don't make people feel like this is something that happened to them because it's their fault or because it was a bad, you know, bad situation, blah, blah, blah. You should just get through with it. You know, it's. It sucks, but they don't have that choice. All they can do is try to survive it. And ultimately, at the end, hopefully it makes them stronger. But there's enough of us that have gone through it. And, you know, many, many people just try to pretend it never happened. And I think that's the wrong attitude to take if that occurred and you survived it and, you know, own it. It's part of your life. It's part of who made you who you are. And now you have the tools and the strength to possibly help someone else who doesn't know what to do right now. And hopefully it'll help put a stop to it. The more people who are less afraid to stay speak out, the better we can take action against it.

I don't know exactly, no. And I work with people with a history of abuse in their families. I mean, not exclusively, but I work with people with complex post traumatic stress disorder. And so there's a lot of childhood abuse that often turns into abuse that continues in adult relationships. And I think that oftentimes, one, it's what they know. So it's kind of what they just think is normal from childhood. But also, like, there's that it's harder to leave than people think it's. And so speaking out about it and having places I think that you can go to lean on people is really powerful. Thank you for being, like, a space that people can go to, to feel not alone in that wild world of domestic violence and abuse, that it's far more rampant than I think people have any idea because we don't talk about it.

People are made to feel ashamed about it. They're like, well, you must have done something or, you know, whatever. When I was in school, actually, one of my middle school instructors, he was the gym health teacher, he figured out what was going on because he saw all the bruises and he went to the school and the school told him, shut up. Don't make waves.

Yeah, that's.

Hopefully that's changed some, I would hope.

But I do know that happened. But his, his resolve when he was told that wasn't to just back down. It was to convince the school board that an entire semester of self defense was mandatory for all women, all girls in that school, because this was something they were going to have growing up. So that was how he twisted it. He was like, okay, fine, you're not going to do anything. I am. And he got it to pass. And so I remember taking self defense classes from a karate instructor in gym class, that he managed to get pulled in and then him spending special attention with me, making sure that I was getting the lesson and that I could strike back at full force where I could start defending myself. And that actually is what led up to me taking a stand against my dad at the time when I finally turned team. So because I finally had the skills to be able to fight back.

Right. I am in love with that PE teacher. Like, what an amazing man he is. Or, like, just.

He. He passed a couple years ago, but he. He definitely. He was my hero growing up. Saved me from that. He's also the one that taught me, no matter what happens, even if it's bad, to take it in, learn from it, and learn, at the very least, learn what not to do, and, you know, try to grow from it. Without him and my music instructors, through school, I probably wouldn't have survived high school. There were quite a few students in my class that committed suicide or met an untimely end due to drugs or drinking, and I was able to avoid that because of them.

So that's the importance of that one adult, even in someone's life when they're a kid, that just makes such a difference. So that is just. I love hearing stories like that about those teachers that show up and, like, the x. Like, they're extra, as my kids would say, or whatever. I don't. Do they still say that? Maybe they've stopped saying that one.

I've given up. Keep up with the modern lingo.

Right? Yeah. Right.

Oh. Sometimes I say things just to annoy my kids, and they'll be like, yeah, don't say that. And I'm like, no, don't say that. So that you don't say it right. Yeah. It's like, nothing prepared me for going from, like, from mama to mommy to mom to bruh.

Hey, bruh. No. You don't feel that way.

Yeah, thank goodness.

Not yet. Right? Yeah.

When they're saying something, and it's like, skippity toilet. And I'm like, wait, what?

Yeah.

Oh, yeah. I'm like, what are you. Yeah, I don't. I mean, I'm sure that. That we had slang, you know, that our parents were like, what? But now I'm like, it doesn't even make sense. Like, what? What is that? Like, no cap or I. I'm making myself sound old. I mean, I am, but not that old, but, yeah, it's. Makes me feel old.

Do we have enough time for two more quick questions?

Sure.

Okay, first question. Okay, so, Amanda, if you don't mind, ask the last question that we have for her. I want to know your. Your mount rush war. Who are the four bands that you really, really, really have to put on a mount Rushmore if you had to pick with four of them?

Bands or artists?

Yeah, I know. Aretha Franklin's gotta be on there for you. Yeah.

Aerosmith.

Good one.

Trying to think so. Well, so my problem is I have. I have a very wide range of music that I. Aretha.

Should we put Aretha up there?

We can just put her on it. I don't know. She's whole thing.

I'd be fine with it. Howlin Wolf, probably. And I should probably. Modern era. Yeah, I'd go with pink.

Pink, good.

I love great variety. I love that. So the question that we usually end on is we all have that one song or album that we listen to, and it just hits us in that certain way that we can't really explain to anyone else, but it's our go to maybe when we're feeling happy or sad or. And. Right. All of those. So what is that, like, album or artist or song that you just go to? It's kind of your go. Just go to no matter what.

If I am either having a really good day or, I guess, a really curvy one in some cases. I'm actually. No one's going to know what the band is, but I'm a big baruch assault fan.

I know where the band is.

Oh, yes. I'm 44. Like, we're that.

Yeah, we're right there, depending on how I'm feeling, will depict which song. So although Volcano Girls is one of my favorite.

Yes. Yes. Volcano.

No. And I. Yes. See, they're right. Like, people need to. We need to go back to those, like, solidarity. Did they come out in the early nineties? Is that when.

Yeah, I think it was the early nineties, but they kind of stayed underground. They didn't hit, like, the really hardcore mainstream scene, so they got really notoriety. Like, they got a little bit of popularity, but then it just kind of slid under the radar. So most people I tell them about that, they're like, who? I'm like, you don't know the song? Like, cedar or. Or volcano girls? Or they're like, what? No, no. Like, okay. Or maybe I was just a punk chat. I don't know.

No, because I. Maybe. Maybe we all were. I don't know. But that was definitely, like, in my. In my playlist, if. Well, I guess we don't really have playlists. It was on my mixtapes.

Yeah.

Yeah. Thank you, man.

Back in the day. Yep. So that's. That was. Yes. Mac. In the middle of high school.

So we were both 14. Amanda.

I know. So long ago. No. Yes. Man. Time has flied by. So, Brandy, thank you so much for being here. Is there anything else that you would like to share with our listeners or anything before we just check out music.

If you get the chance, you can find everything on my [email protected]. and yeah, I hope that everybody enjoys it.

Yeah, it is good stuff. I really encourage you to listen to it. It was my, was my music today at the gym, so I appreciated it. It was. It's great. And it's definitely, like you said, it's got a rock, country, pop, all of the things vibe to it. So I think everyone can find something that they would love. So, I mean, then you have that. Sorry, did that cover of hallelujah, that was just beautiful. Sorry.

Yeah, I recorded that for children's hospital for a fundraiser they were doing.

Really?

Yeah. So. And then once that was over, we. We released it. So sorry.

I really did. I, like, listen to all the things. I went down the rabbit hole and it was so fun and enjoyable, and you've got me through leg day, so thank you very much.

Leg day is the worst, right? Yeah.

Never skip.

We honestly love you. And come back anytime you want to. Okay?

Thank you so much.

Thank you for having me.

So thank you all for listening to today's episode of when words fail, music speak. And remember, when words fail, music speaks.

Bye, guys.

Have a great day. It.